Well, after a long hiatus I've returned and...ah hell, no one reads this anyway. None the less, something humbled me I suppose, so I'm less, well...jolly and exuberant we'll say. Be it from an uneventful summer or otherwise, I've been bored enough to come back here and update. So hold onto your hats and junk, because I'm back.

If you aren't on my messenger list or I just haven't told you, yesterday was my final little vacation before school: a trip to Chicago. Now, just sit back as you read another one of Maro's marvelous tales.

Woke up about 6 in the morning feeling a little groggy still, seeing as I went to bed at eleven and I'm sure I didn't fall asleep till 1 or so, and even then I kept tossing and turning and waking up every half an hour. Not a good start as far as sleep.

I went downstairs, got dressed and all, finished breakfast, yadda yadda same morning routine. Now, me and mom left the house around 7:20 when our train was leaving about 7:40, also not a good start.

(I printed a schedule for the times the train leaves South Bend, remember this)

We get to the South Bend airport (where the train is) with, oh, about 5 minutes until the train leaves. Me and mom are both running as fast as we could to the train. About half way to it the conductor yells those classic words "All aboard!" which translates to "If you aren't on the goddamned train yet and need to be, then hurry the fuck up!" We get there with about 2 minutes to spare, only to have mom told that she needs to buy some tickets first. We have NOT A SECOND to stop and buy tickets, but fortunately, someone nice informs her that they can be bought on the train, it's just $1 extra. Well, $1 extra is better than missing the train so we get on board just as the thing is starting to leave. I'm feeling pretty hot from doing all that running to catch it as well. Either way, me and mom are both glad we made the train.

The ride there seemed to get worse and worse. I have a touch of motion sickness so the thing with the train rocking back and forth and such as we go over a curve isn't doing me any good at all. But, I do get to watch this guy play New Super Mario Bros on his DS (and beat it, too). Right before we arrive at the station, mom asks someone if the Science and Industy Museum is too far from the others. The woman says "Oh no! You guys can walk there"

After a long while of waiting to get there and having a headache and a stomach ache (sprinting around after eating breakfast is never a good idea) me and mom finally make it to the 57th street platform in Chicago. We head from the train down the platform, down the steps and out into the street. I'm looking around and spot a very old architechtured building in the distance: our first stop. Me and mom head there and sure enough there it is, The Museum of Science and Industry.

We head in through a side enterance, climb down some stairs and finally get behind people waiting in line to buy their tickets. After some waiting, people are finally released to buy their tickets at the counters. Me and mom are up next as we decide to buy two CityPass tickets (gets you admission to five major Chicago attractions). But wait, theres a problem. The guy with the CityPass tickets hasn't arrived yet this morning...so, me and mom are stuck waiting a good 45 minutes at the front desk until we finally get our CityPasses...

After a fun little run through of the museum (though I didn't get to see much since we're on a restrained schedule) we're ready to head to the next one. It's about 11:30 and I had breakfast at 6:30, so you can imagine I'm pretty damn hungry (and thirsty) right about now. I try to get a nice, cool bottle of water from a machine...no luck at all. The machine looks alright (besides it being $2 for anything in it) but the thing that takes your money is broken. Great...

We head outside and decide to get a cab to the other museums (since the Science and Industry museum is a good 7 miles from the other museums). We arrive soon at the front of the Field Museum (about history), the fare is $15...yeah, $15 for seven miles. Thank you mister cab driver for ripping off a couple tourists. But, that feeling washes away as I discover my savior...a Chicago-style hot dog vendor. Me and mom grab a couple dogs and two bottles of water before we pass out. I eat mine in about four bites and chug the water. I don't know about you, but you have to be pretty damn thirsty to chug 20 ounces of water in a single go.

(remember the woman earlier that said we could walk from the Science and Industry museum to the Field Museum?...yeah, either 7 miles isn't very far for her to walk or she lied to us)

We head inside, show the guy our tickets and such and then we're in. We're examining the place and taking a couple shots of some stuff. After finding the stairs that go down, we do just that, head downstairs. We do a walk-through exhibit of Egyptian life (it was the big thing there this summer), see some tombs and mummies, then head out. Before heading into another exhibit I thought was about mines and underground tours, we discover that it's about dirt...yep, just plain old dirt. So, after finding this out, I discover this museum must be the most boring fucking place in the world.

After trying to find something interesting about it (and buying a neat lil gift) me and mom decide to head out yet again. Our next stop is the Alder Planetarium. Not too long of a walk from here. Heck, we get to walk along side a lake as we head for the planetarium. We get a good view of Navy Pier and the Chicago skyline. Seems to be a good day after all...

We finally reach the Planetarium and have an awesome time inside. We get to eat a nice sandwich at the cafe, get to buy some crap at the gift shop, and get to see a nice showing of the stars and such in the planetarium. The day is looking up after all...

After a walk back to where we originated from (and seeing five weddings along the pier) we head to the Shedd Aquarium. I swear to god, there were shorter lines at Disney World compared to the one at the aquarium. So we wait...and wait...and wait...and once we're finally inside the place, the line is even longer. But, because of our CityPass, we get to jump to a special line with...3 people in it. So, we're being very grateful we have these CityPasses right about now.

The aquarium had to be the best place. They had nearly every kind of sea creature imagineable. But, I think the river otter had to be the cutest lil thing there (awww). With the penguins and dolphins in second and third place. Now, this is when our trip goes straight downhill...

We walk from the aquarium to a trolley stop (the trolley is like the bus, except the windows are open, no air conditioning, looks like a trolley car, and it's free to ride) only to be told by this woman that "The trolley stops running at 5:30" and it's close to 5:30 now. She also tells us that past the Field Museum is a bus stop (less crowded than the closest one). So, we walk down there only to find that there isn't one, the lady lied to us...not only that, but just the bus we want (that goes downtown to the Hancock building) is at the crowded bus stop. We dash over to it as quick as we can, but it's too late. The bus takes off...

So, my feet are aching, and we have to wait for another 146 bus. Easy...or so we thought. While we continue to wait, seeing trolley after trolley just down the street ("they stop running at 5:30"...yeah, we can see that. Thanks alot, bitch) There's three numbers of busses: 12, 130, and 146. We want a 146. And as our luck would have it, we see 12's and 130's that keep going and going and going (hell, I bet we saw the same bus twice or three times).

After about an hour and 45 minutes of waiting we finally get the bus we want. So, we take a ride downtown. But we don't go directly to where we want, no the bus has to loop through these streets trying to pick up and drop off as many people as possible before we get where we need to go. Finally we're here. We've actually made it to the Hancock building. The sun may be setting but we've made it. We head inside to the observatory, tear off our tickets and hand them to the guy at the counter, and then...another line. It was about a forty-five minute wait till we would get to go into the observatory and we didn't have much time until our train arrived at the station. So, we decided forget this and simply walked away...

We needed to get dinner somewhere. And yet again I find myself thirsty as hell. We go for this restaraunt that my mom once went to when her friends took her here once. Now, I'm sure it would've been nice if the place still existed. Eventually we settled for something quick. Pizza was the answer there. This time I chugged a 33 ounce bottle of water (god damn I was thirsty). And we decide since we couldn't make the train we were hoping for, we'd have to settle for the last train out of Chicago.

After a nice meal we head out into the street again, searching around and soon finding a bus stop, with the bus there that we wanted! Mom asked the driver if this bus went to the 57th street South Shore station, and the driver said yes. Good. We were finally heading home...or so we thought. The bus seemed to head back to the 57th street station until it turned around and started driving back the way it came from. We knew something was wrong when we headed past the Hancock building. Mom asked a woman in front of us if this bus heads for the South Shore, she grimly replied "No, you're headed the wrong way. This bus is heading all the way north." Shit...

We get off the bus as fast as we can. We're panicking now. We're miles from the station and the train arrives in an hour and a half. We search around for another bus stop while running. We find a woman and ask her if she knows the route. She does and we ask her what bus heads for the station. She doesn't know so she calls the bus transit line for us for directions. Mom can't make out what the woman on the phone with the bus transit directions is saying and it's even hard for me to as well. I hear "get on a 147, head for Michigan and Balbo, get off the bus, wait for another bus, take the bus to the station (or, in a nutshell thats what she said)"

So, we head for the bus stop we should, only to find our bus was already there and is just leaving. We missed it... Now, we continue to wait for another 147, only to assume that 147s have stopped running for the night. Besides money for the train, we have $19 left. We resort to a cab. Mom tells the cab driver that we only have $19 and we need to get to the South Shore station. He replices nicely (though foreignly) "That's ok. Get in." I'm watching the fare meter the entire time, seeing it slowly climb higher towards our $19. We make it right to the station with a fare of $18.65. Mom gives the guy our $19 thankfully as we mosey onto the station. Just when we think it's finally over...it isn't. Just like a bad horror movie.

So, we're waiting at the station with some other people (they weren't bad people, they were just your average inner city, rowdy, loud black guys with their girlfriends and kids) waiting on a 9:40 train. Since we're an hour early, we have a while to wait. Remember that schedule for the trains I talked about earlier? Right at this point is where we realize that the schedule is from South Bend to Chicago, not from Chicago to South Bend...yeah, now we have no fucking clue when the next train is coming. Hell, we could've missed the last train! We ask the nice people waiting if they know, and they say it's going to be here at 10:15. No problem...

It wasn't. 10:15 and the train still wasn't here. They come back to us with a reply that they were looking at the AM, not PM schedule. They believe the next train will be here at 11:30. Fantastic... Me and mom both have to piss and I'm thirsty as hell yet again. So, we've been waiting at this train station for a good 3 hours now (I even read this newspaper thing I found somewhere. I thought it was just another something like The Chicago Tribune but it was the Windy City Times, which is a special news paper for gay and lesbian readers only. I could only hope mom didn't see me blush when I found that out). Finally, at 11:30 our train is here. We couldn't be happier.

We hop on board, thinking about the poor pooch at home (since she was only fed once that day and was only let outside once). We start to relax, glad that we'll finally make it home...but no, of course not! Some unseen force has to make sure we don't make it back home. This unseen force is in the form of a conductor whom we pay for our ticket. We ask her if this goes to South Bend and she replies no, it only goes to Michigan City (a good 30 miles from South Bend)...

We're now properly fucked. There's no one who can pick us up in Michigan City. We have no money for a hotel. No money for a cab. Nothing...we'll be stranded there. But, yet again the forces out to make sure we get home prevail as this...well, kind of odd looking fellow hears of our troubles and tells us his brother is picking him up in Michigan City and heading for South Bend and we could merely ride along. Mom was reluctant at first but we had no other choice. We had to put our faith in this man...

After nodding off a few times and hearing of his own amazing adventures (I liked the story about his visit to Roswell, New Mexico the best) we arrive in Michigan City. Just like the man promised, his brother is there to pick us all up and head for South Bend. I stay quiet most of the time, kind of shy as well being in some guy's car that neither me nor mom know. So mom and the guy from the train talk about stuff for a while until we finally arrive at the South Bend airport at 3am.

A few "life saving thank you's" later, we head for the SUV and amazingly find it's still there. I'm amazed. We head for the gate to get out of here only to find there is no pay to get out place. There's this thing where you put in a recipt you recieve earlier (which we didn't get). Or use a credit card. So, now we haeve no way out...or do we? A guy infront of us uses his credit card to open the gate to get out himself, only to find after using it, the gate stayed up. It malfunctioned to our advantage...we drive on out of the parking lot and head back home. I wanted to fall asleep but I just couldn't. After what we went through I was sure something else was going to stop us from getting home. Maybe a car drives off the center line and smashes us, maybe something in the car breaks and fails, but nothing happened. We get home safely to my amazement...

I guzzle down two bottles of water then thankfully go to sleep, glad that me and mom actually made it home alright.

There could be many morals to this story, but I don't care. The only thought I have left is I fucking hate the city.